“charismatic” cloud lifted.

I was thinking the other day about Jesus and all and I was like so much of our relationship is “experience”. It’s been that way since 03 and I was trying to think if I was mad or if this was totally legit.

I learned a bit about “mystics” (the pursuit of communion with, identity with, or conscious awareness of an ultimate reality, divinity, spiritual truth, or God through direct experience, intuition, instinct or insight) in the college days and I was always intrigued by their times with their Father. I think the combination of several factors has gained my admiration for these “times with Him” and thus cultivated this sort of relationship I have with Him.

Let’s look at this… I lost two parents in the matter of 4 months. In the midst of this craziness I was technically “saved” in the “born again” sense of the term and I reveled in my time with Him. I can only explain my hunger for something as what introduced me to this kind of relationship that I deem totally normal and most necessary.

CS writes, “If you find in yourself a desire, which NOTHING in this world satisfies then the probable explanation is you were made for another world”

This piece of info was the theme of my days then. I had tried everything. I mean my family was wealthy. We were far from need and most definitely more on the “want” side of things. I tried the bars and the boys. I was on an endless pursuit for pleasure and fulfillment and nothing came to the rescue. Until I was found by Him.

I know that my completely eccentric ways are the whole reason that I have this type of relationship. I only know that without these heartaches of deep loss I should have been driven to more sex, drugs and rock and roll- or anything else that could satisfy the need in my soul- instead I was intrigued by this new found relationship which seemed to satisfy me in ways I had never known.

I remember a literal hunger pang for Him. I had no other hopes in the world or people or particulars in my life. The guy I was with had gone crazy and I was more passive than the wallpaper allowing this tangent of my life continue into oblivion. I knew the only solace during this time was in these intimate moments I was experiencing with my new found friend.

My desperation has decreased but the same is true for now. I expect when I seek Him, to find Him.

I started thinking of all the places in the Word that literally God “showed up”. I am no theologian but I could see that most of the characters from the Scripture had these incredible “defining moments” with Him.

Moses and that crazy burning bush. The sea parting and all. Joseph and his vivid dreams. Abraham and specific holy visits from His Heavenly Father. I knew this wasn’t just something for them. And NO, I am not saying I am comparable to the Greats of the Old Testament, I am just trying to paint you a picture.

I saw the “charismatic” cloud lifting, making room for the sensibility of the Son to show up.

There are MORE incidences of people showing up in a remote place with Him than not. It’s laced in the characters lives one after the other.  Look for yourself. I am thinking of Daniel in the den. I am remembering Samuel being “woken up” in the middle of the night by who, oh yea, the Man Himself.

And think about it, it’s all over the New Testament as well. How many times did JC give a dream to one of his prized possessions? Like Joseph and Mary. And the story of Elizabeth and John the Baptist and Saul who became Paul’s- literal conversion moment with His Dad. It’s all over the dang place. These are just off the top of my head but I am 100% sure that if I was to delve I would not be disappointed. And some are thinking, “well, that’s what you are looking for, of course you will find it!” And you are precisely correct, I just want you to find it out for yourself like I have repeatedly done.

I see that a large percent of God’s proving and  in our life comes from our literal “time with Him”. Not just, “let me read in my Bible for a bit or turn on the worship music while I am driving”.

NO! I am talking about, “time to get face to face” or “face to bush, or to the ground”… you get my point.